Raise your hand if your ideas about what EXACTLY to do during sex have come from:
• Porn
• Women’s Magazines touting Kim Kardashian
• Embarrassed gym teachers assigned to teach Sex Ed in middle school (or worse…high school)
• Sexual partners also self-educated via Google
• If you’re old enough, illicit copies of Playboy most likely found in your parents bedroom or an older sibling’s closet.
When can we, as women, discuss the taboo truth that there are few if any resources for women to learn about what actually gives us pleasure and contributes to a safe, confident, creative and fun experience – for us?
So many women suffer shame, embarrassment, or lack of confidence during sexual encounters because we feel the pressure to perform like porn stars in the bedroom, without any support for our needs. Yes, we turn to our friends for margarita-fueled private conversations and we read self-help books and blogs. Perhaps, if we’re assertive, we broach a delicate topic with our doctors in the 30-second window they have for our “extra questions.” But real life situations take more time and care than your anonymous chat room buddies or a Buzzfeed slideshow can provide.
If you have ever experienced issues such as:
• Lack of satisfying sex with a partner
• Low libido or concerns about orgasm
• Painful or uncomfortable sex
• Negative body image or body issues from childbirth, aging or menopause
• Difficulty communicating about sex and expressing your needs
• Inexperience or questions around losing your virginity
…You may be feeling discouraged and wondering where to get help that actually works, without feeling shame and embarrassment in the process.
Myth: Sex Therapists Are Only For Couples
Because our society rarely discusses sexual problems openly, it’s easy to overlook sex and intimacy coaching as an incredible resource, and not just for couples. Sex coaching is completely anonymous, judgment-free, and is there to fully support all your questions and needs. Learning more about your body, what gives you pleasure and working through any challenges from trauma and shyness to learning new skills and how to communicate effectively, can help you navigate 21st century dating at any age and help you bring your ideal lover into your life.
Maybe you have a new lover and you’re nervous about inexperience, or you’re uncovering new aspects of your identity such as motherhood or a change in sexual orientation. Seeing a sex coach can also help you experience sex more fully by exploring deeper levels of pleasure, g-spot stimulation, female ejaculation, sex toys, or new ways to pleasure yourself. You can ask a sex and intimacy coach anything you want about sex without fear or judgment, and it’s a great way to learn more about your sexual anatomy and find out what really works for you.
The female body is capable of incredible bliss – we are the fortunate ones in that we’re built with an organ whose sole purpose is pleasure! Sex is supposed to be fun, it’s supposed to feel good, and when we have healthy attitude about it, get to know our own bodies, and have the courage ask for what we want, there’s no limit to the joy and pleasure we can experience.
Would you like a private conversation to see how sex therapy can help you? Contact me, I would be delighted to speak with you.