Recommends
Here are some wonderful recommendations
BOOKS ON RELATIONSHIP:
- Tell Me What You Want by Justin J. Lehmiller
- The Art of Receiving and Giving by Betty Martin D.C., Robyn Dalzen
- Why Won’t You Apologize? by Harriet Lerner PhD
- Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson EdD
- Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel
- Undefended Love by Jett Psaris, Marlena S Lyons
- Naked at Our Age by Joan Price
- Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch PhD
- Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan, Cacilda Jetha
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman PhD, Nan Silver
- Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships by John Welwood
- The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
- Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix
- The Queen’s Code by Alison A. Armstrong
- Eight Dates by John and Julie Gottman PhD, Doug and Rachel Abrams M.D.
- Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It by Dr. Marty Klein
- America’s War on Sex by Dr. Marty Klein
BOOKS ON OPEN RELATIONSHIPS:
- Polysecure by Jessica Fern , Eve Rickert , Nora Samaran
- The Polyamorists Next Door by Elisabeth Sheff
- Opening Up by Tristan Taormino
- The Ethical Slut by Janet W. Hardy , Dossie Easton
- Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits by Deborah M. Anapol
BOOKS FOR COUPLES:
- Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex – and How to Get It
- 101 Nights of Great Sex by Laura Corn
- She Comes First by Ian Kerner
- Passionista by Ian Kerner
- Making Love Real by Danielle Harel PhD , Celeste Hirschman MA
- The New Monogamy by Tammy Nelson PhD
- The Heart of Desire by Stella Resnick
- Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
- The State of Affairs by Esther Perel
- Coming Together by Danielle Harel PhD , Celeste Hirschman MA
BOOKS FOR WOMEN:
- My Secret Garden: Women’s Sexual Fantasies
- Sex for One by Betty Dodson
- Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston CNM. RN. BSN. LMT
- For Yourself by Lonnie Barbach
- The Multi-Orgasmic Woman by Mantak Chia , Rachel Carlton Abrams M.D.
- Sexual Awakening by Dr. Shakti Mari Malan
- Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.
- Come As You Are Workbook by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.
- Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas
- Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving by Charles Muir , Caroline Muir
- Tantric Sex for Women by Christa Schulte
BOOKS FOR MEN:
- Coping With Premature Ejaculation by Michael Metz
- Manhood by Laura Dodsworth
- The Hardness Factor by Steven Lamm, M.D.
- The New Male Sexuality by Bernie Zilbergeld
- The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia
- Cockfidence by Celeste and Danielle
HELP WITH PORNOGRAPHY:
- The Myth of Sex Addiction
- Your Brain on Porn by Gary Wilson
- The Porn Trap by Wendy Maltz
- The Porn Myth by Matt Fradd
- Ethical Porn for Dicks by David J. Ley
- His Porn, Her Pain by Marty Klein
LGBTQIA+:
- Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen
- Trans Bodies, Trans Selves by Laura Erickson-Schroth
- The Invisible Orientation by Julie Sondra Decker
- Susie Sexpert’s Lesbian Sex World by Susie Bright by Allison Moon
- The Ethical Slut by Allison Moon
- The Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein , Felice Picano
COMMUNICATION:
- Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD, Deepak Chopra
- Cleis Press Sextionary Editors by The Editors of Cleis Press
KIDS AND TEEN SEX EDUCATION:
- The Sex Education Answer Book by Cath Hakanson
- Project Parent by Lin Myers Jovanovic
- S.E.X. by Heather Corinna
- Sex Is a Funny Word by Cory Silverberg
SEXUAL TRAUMA, SHAME & HEALING:
- Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love Is a Survivor of Child Sexual Abuse
- When Sex Hurts: Understanding and Healing Pelvic Pain
- The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
- Sex, God, and the Conservative Church by Tina Schermer Sellers
- Beyond Shame by Matthias Roberts
- Pure by Linda Kay Klein
- Healing Sex by Staci Haines
- The Survivor’s Guide to Sex by Staci Haines
- The Courage To Heal by Ellen Bass , Laura Davis
- The Sexual Healing Journey by Wendy Maltz
BOOKS ON TANTRA, SEX MAGIC AND OTHER PRACTICES:
- The Art of Sexual Ecstasy by Alice B. Stockham MD
- Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas
- The Art of Sexual Ecstasy by Barbara Carrellas
- The Heart of Tantric Sex by Diana Richardson
- Luxurious Loving by Barbara Carrellas
- Making Love by Barry Long
- The Heart and Soul of Sex by Gina Ogden
BOOKS ON KINK:
- Ultimate Guide to Kink by Tristan Taormino, Barbara Carrellas
- When Someone You Love is Kinky by Dossie Easton , Catherine A. Liszt
- SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman
- Playing Well with Others by Lee Harrington, Mollena Williams
- Wild Side Sex by Midori
- Power Circuits by Raven Kaldera
- The New Bottoming by Janet W. Hardy, Dossie Easton
- Topping by Janet W. Hardy
- The Loving Dominant by John Warren, Libby Warren
- Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Molly Devon, Philip Miller
- Female Dominance by Claudia Varrin
SEXY LIT & FICTION:
SPECIAL OFFERS TO SHARE WITH YOU
As a sex and intimacy coach, I often encounter deals and specials for books, products, and companies I recommend, and I like to pass them along to you!
Special deals at LELO.com
Special deals at Goodvibes
PLEASURES OF THE HEART
For local shopping, I recommend Pleasures of the Heart in San Rafael, California. This delightful, women-owned and operated, sex-positive shop is all about helping its customers build sexual confidence and a happy, healthy sex life, and offers a 10% discount to my clients.
Shop online for some of my recommendations for high-quality, non-toxic toys and supplies:
SEXUAL HEALTH & LUBRICANTS:
- Sliquid Organics Natural Lubricating Gel
- Good Clean Love: Almost Naked Personal Lubricant
- Uberlube
- Quim Oh Yes! Latex-Safe Serum (contains cannabis)
FORIA
Foria makes exquisite, high-quality, all-natural and organic products enhanced with CBD for sensual pleasure, intimacy, wellness, and pain relief. I highly recommend their products. Learn more about Foria and receive 10% off your purchase by clicking the banner below.
LELO
Lelo makes some of the most sophisticated, beautiful toys on the market today. Two decades of science and design have gone into the creation of Lelo toys. Click on the image or name of the toy for more information or to make a purchase.
FOR WOMEN:
- Tiani™2 remote control couples’ massager, worn internally
- Lily™2 – aromatherapeutic stimulator with 8 settings, for solo play or for nestling between a couple
- Mia™2 – personal vibrator with lipstick-like case; USB chargeable
- Ora™2 oral sex simulator
- INA Wave™ – gspot and clitoral stimulator
FOR MEN:
- Inez™ vibrator for prostate stimulation or use with a partner
- Loki™ – waterproof prostate massager with six variable settings
- LOKI Wave™ – internal/external prostate stimulator with 10 settings
- Billy™ – prostate massager, great for beginners
- Hugo™ – remote-controlled prostate massager for coupled or solo play
FOR COUPLES:
- Hula Beads™ – remote-controlled pleasure beats that rotate and vibrate
- Ida™ – remote-controlled couples’ vibrator worn by women when making love; rotates, swirls and vibrates
- Lyla™2 – vibrating bullet-style massager with a wireless remote
- Noa™2 – couples’ massager worn by women; clitoral/g-spot stimulation
- LELO Couples Play
GOOD VIBRATIONS
The original sex-positive, women-friendly shop, Good Vibrations has been in business since 1977. These are some of the toys I endorse:
ADULT SEX ED:
- A Lifetime of Better Sex – The Sinclair Institute
- The Better Sex Video Series, Volumes 1, 2 and 3 – The Sinclair Institute
- How to Satisfy Your Man, Volumes 1 & 2 – The Alexander Institute
- Ultimate Seduction Techniques, Volumes 1 & 2 – The Alexander Institute
- The Art of Kama Sutra – The Alexander Institute
TV SHOWS:
SEXY & EROTIC MOVIES:
- Tipping the Velvet
- Kamasutra
- Y Tu Mama También
- Fragments of Love
- Below her mouth
- Weekend
- Bliss
- Lost Tango in Paris
- Shortbus
- Sleeping Beauty
- Nine and 1/2 weeks
- Secretary
- Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!
- Embrace
ETHICAL PORN:
- xConfessions
- Lust Cinema
- Bright Desire
- The Crash Pad Series – queer-friendly
Make Love Not Porn
PODCASTS:
- Sex and Psychology Podcast
- Sex with Emily
- The Savage Lovecast
- Sex Out Loud
- The Sex Ed
- Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy
- Erotic Awakening
AUDIOBOOKS:
- Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.
- The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy
- Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters – and How to Get It by Dr. Laurie Mintz
- Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel
- Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá
- The Multi-Orgasmic Couple: Sexual Secrets Every Couple Should Know by Mantak Chia , Rachel Carlton Abrams M.D.
- Delta of Venus by Anaïs Nin
- Dipsea Stories
SEX WEDGES AND CUSHIONS:
- Liberator Wedge Intimate Sex Positioning Pillow
- Liberator Pulse
- Liberator Bonbon Sex Toy Mount
- Liberator Wedge & Ramp Sex Positioning Pillow Combo
BDSM AND KINK FURNITURE:
FURNITURE FOR DIVERSE BODIES AND ABILITIES:
WEBSITES:
OMGyes: https://start.omgyes.com/join
Senior Living For Lgbtqia Adults: www.caring.com/resources/stds-sexual-health-in-retirement-homes/
Caring: https://www.seniorhomes.com/senior-living-for-lgbtqia-adults/
Center for Disease Control: www.cdc.gov
Planned Parenthood: www.plannedparenthood.com
Helping Survivors of Sexual Assault and Abuse: What Consent Looks Like
The Sex, Gender & Relationships Hotline: www.sgrhotline.org
Santé Francophone (French Directory of SF Therapy Professionals): http://santefrancophone.com
Sexological Bodywork: www.sexologicalbodyworkers.org
International Professional Surrogates Association (IPSA): www.surrogatetherapy.org
Trusted Bodywork: www.trustedbodywork.com
YourTango.com: www.yourtango.com
Bad Girls Bible: badgirlsbible.com
National Coalition for Sexual Freedom: www.kapprofessionals.org/
SIECUS for comprehensive sex education resources
Sexual Health Includes Pleasure (SHIP): https://weknowship.org/
The Loving BDSM Podcast by Kayla Lords and John Brownstone: https://lovingbdsm.net/loving-bdsm-podcast/
RESOURCES FOR PARENTS, CHILDREN AND TEENS:
Scarleteen Sex Education for the Real World: www.scarleteen.com
Sex Ed Rescue: www.sexedrescue.com
Amaze: www.amaze.org – videos with age-appropriate sex ed for parents and kids
KidsHealth: kidshealth.org/ – concise description of Understanding Early Sexual Development (for parents)
Gender Spectrum: www.genderspectrum.org – for parents with gender-nonconforming children