How to stay connected
The holiday season is an invitation for joyous connection, and it’s also a busy time for many of us. When we’re so busy with social engagements, we might actually lose sight of what’s really most important – truly staying connected with ourselves, and with our intimate partners. For some, self-care during this time is even more important.
Make time to talk.
Make time to have important conversations before the holiday season. Check in with yourself, with each other, or with friends and family. This can really help alleviate some of the more stressful moments that may arise. If the holidays give you anxiety, reach out! Talk to a friend, or tell your partner how you feel and how they can support you before you go, so they know what kind of help you’ll need to have your best time.
Mom always asking about your relationship status? Special traditions your family celebrates your partner might not know about? Check in beforehand so you can approach the holidays feeling more confident.
Make a game of it.
When the holiday social calendar and to-do lists start to fill up, it’s important to make sure that self-care, personal time and intimacy don’t get lost in the fray. Taking care of ourselves and our relationships can ground us and give us safe space no matter what else the holiday season brings, so if you find yourselves rushing off to a party after work, take the next morning off. Sleep in. Treat yourself to a nice breakfast or make one together. Enjoy a brisk winter walk together through some neighborhood Christmas lights. Sneak off for some sexy time together, make time for and create new holiday traditions – just for you.
If you find yourself constantly surrounded by family during the holiday season, make a game of it. Hold hands whenever you can. Sneak kisses. Wear something fun under your clothes that only the two of you know about it. You may need to keep it PG around family, but that can actually make it really fun!
What about holiday sex?
Like always, check in. Not everyone’s more interested in sex during the holidays, and the busyness and anxiety that some people go through can make them even less interested. When you check in, this gives you or your partner the opportunity to speak to this so that being preoccupied or distracted by the other things doesn’t get interpreted as rejection, and creates space for more non-sexual touch – which is just as important for allowing closeness and intimacy to grow.
What if the holidays aren’t fun and social for me?
That’s okay. There are all sorts of reasons why this season isn’t necessarily a time of connection and fun for everyone, so if this is what you’re experiencing, remember the important self-care during this time. Let this be a perfect time to get to know yourself better. If you’re in need of a little support, or you want more fun ideas on how to reconnect with yourself or your partner during the holidays, please reach out!