We’re not having sex as much, and it’s shocking.
Well, here’s some disconcerting news: since February this year, The Atlantic, time.com, The Salt Lake Tribune, cnn.com, and many other news outlets have run stories about how Americans, especially millennials, are having a lot less sex these days – in fact, many are not having sex at all. In a time where Tinder and other dating apps make finding a hook-up about as easy as finding a plumber, birth control is practically free, and culture has, basically, become far more tolerant of sex in general, what’s going on?
Why aren’t people having sex so much?
Referred to by some as “The Great American Sex Drought,” social scientists offer up statistics like twenty-somethings not pairing up until later in life, and also to a lesser rate of “labor force participation,” especially for men. Employment and financial struggles can often put a strain on relationships, and for those who aren’t already in one, it can do a number on your self-esteem and feelings of desirability, making one less inclined to “put themselves out there”. Add to this the many millennials who are still living at home with their parents (bringing someone home can feel a bit awkward), and the myriad ways technology has offered to entertain ourselves, and we have a recipe for a sexless generation.
Sex is healthy.
Good sex is good for us! It can boost our moods and lower our stress levels, maybe shrink our waistlines, ease menstrual cramps, help us sleep better, keep vaginal muscles strong, encourage our bodies to fight disease, and of course, give us a youthful glow. While millennials aren’t perhaps as concerned about these general health benefits, good sex can potentially increase our lifespans, too, so why not get a head start?
So what can we do about this?
As a sex coach, I frequently work with people who are dealing with self-esteem challenges. They’re often spending more time on social media and less time socializing and need some gentle guidance on how to start connecting with others in person again. While these particular issues aren’t necessarily “easy” to overcome, there are proven methods which help rebuild confidence, develop real communication skills and get back out there. While sex itself may not be the primary reason for doing so, getting out, meeting other people and just enjoying life are vital to a healthy, vibrant, balanced life… and may also offer opportunities for connection for those who have situational difficulties (like living with their parents). They may not always lead to sex, but on the path to enhancing your experience of personal joy and pleasure, it’s all about the journey to a turned-on life. I’m here to help – please get in touch!