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What is polyamory and ethical non-monogamy?

There are a lot of assumptions about polyamory and ethical non-monogamy, but scientists are starting to take a much closer look and the research results are revealing quite a bit. These relationships aren’t as common as monogamous relationships but there are a growing number of people who find fulfillment and satisfaction in them and it’s redefining how many of us relate.

Not everyone in a polyamorous relationship is a swinger, or even promiscuous, and being polyamorous doesn’t mean cheating on your partner, either. Many use the umbrella term “ethical non-monogamy”, meaning that they participate in multiple romantic and/or sexual relationships simultaneously, with the consent and knowledge of everyone involved. There are a variety of ways in which ethically non-monogamous relationships can be structured, different ways that those involved set boundaries or relate to each other, how much they know or interact with other partners, and whether a polyamorous set of partners is open or closed, but the one thing that is common throughout all of ethically non-monogamous relationships is the level of respect and communication required.

While polyamorists and ethical non-monogamists have been around for a long, long time, it’s only recently that these types of relationships have become a more public topic. This article from Vice talks about why that is and reveals some of the findings from research, and this one explains seven important terms you should know.

Learning to navigate boundaries, communicate clearly and work with vulnerable feelings like jealousy are challenges that come up in any relationship, but especially when it comes to polyamorous, ethically non-monogamous and open relationships. I’ve got some great books on my resources page if this is something you’re interested in exploring more, and I’m here to help if you’re curious, or if you’re considering new pathways for your current relationship.