How to Stimulate the G-Spot
Last week we talked about the male and female g-spots and how to find them. This week, we’ll go into more depth about how (and when) to stimulate for your pleasure.
The G-Spot isn’t something you focus on right away. For women especially, being in a high state of arousal prior to stimulating the G-Spot is really important otherwise she may feel discomfort rather than pleasure, if she feels anything at all. It’s not something to just jump right into – set aside at least an hour to play and explore, and enjoy the process without attachment to outcome.
Where is it and what do I do?
This should go without saying, but wash your hands. You’ll want short, clean fingernails. This is delicate territory, and sharp fingernails could cut or scrape, or destroy barriers like gloves and condoms if you use them.
FEMALE BODY: The female G-Spot lives about 2.5-3″ in on the upper wall of the vagina. Fingers are generally the best way to locate the G-Spot. Because of where it’s located, it can sometimes be a little difficult for a woman to do this herself. If you’re not playing with a partner, G-Spot stimulators like the Gigi 2 from Lelo or the cool stainless steel Njoy G-Spot toy can make your reach a lot easier. Whether with a toy or fingers, experiment with pressure and angle to find what feels best. Toys produced especially for G-Spot stimulation will have an upward curve to them, but if you’re using fingers, insert one or two with palm up, then curl the fingers up in a “come hither” movement. You may or may not feel a textural difference in the vaginal wall, and remember, you’re looking more for an “area” than a “spot” that’s about the size of a quarter. Once you find and determine what feels good, you can keep the touch slow and gentle or increase pressure, speed and intensity. You can also experiment with different intercourse positions that will stimulate the g-spot, too. Some women prefer the combination of clitoral and G-Spot stimulation for heightened pleasure. Discover what feels good to you!
MALE BODY: The prostate gland, also known as the “male G-Spot” or “P-Spot”, is about two inches up into the rectum. This gland, about the size of a walnut, is where the seminal fluid in ejaculate is produced. Again, people tend to enjoy this kind of stimulation more if they’re already aroused – it’s not something to jump into right away! Combining genital and prostate stimulation can increase pleasure even more and some men prefer this to isolated prostate touch. You can stimulate the prostate indirectly by massaging the perineum (the area between the scrotum and the anus), placing extra focus on the softer, fleshier region closer to the anus. Directly, the prostate is stimulated by penetrating the anus. It’s much easier if you’re relaxed and go slowly (lube lube lube lube!), especially if you’re new to anal penetration. If you’re using fingers, again, that same “come hither” movement will help you find the prostate more easily, and you’ll feel a fleshy bulb of tissue that feels different from the surrounding area. Initial stimulation may make you feel like you need to pee – you’re in the right ‘spot’ so to speak! You can also try a toy made for prostate stimulation, though these are generally larger than fingers so if you’re new to this kind of penetration, start small, go slow and work your way up.
Not everyone finds g-spot stimulation pleasurable or comfortable – many people do, so it’s worth exploring to see if it’s a turn-on for you and enhances your pleasure! Please let me know if you’d like some more tips on G-Spot stimulation. Remember to stay pleasure-oriented, not goal-oriented!