Happy Valentine’s!
Curious about the new “Sex, Love, & Goop” Netflix docuseries? This may be just the show to inspire new depth and exploration in your sex-life. Hosted by Gwenyth Paltrow, the show explores the challenges (including sexual and relational) that many couples face in relationship. Her intention is to explore and ideally help to improve these relationships by enlisting the help of a sex therapist (who has supported her in her own relationship with her husband Brad) sexological bodyworkers and sex and intimacy coaches!
Groundbreaking
If you’re unfamiliar with the field of sex-coaching, you might be curious about what that can look like. This series is a hopeful vision into the possibilities of working with sexologists to deepen intimacy and improve sex-lives. Nothing like it has ever been on mainstream TV. In many ways, it’s paving the way for mainstream media to normalize taboo topics. “Sex, Love & Goop” offers you an opportunity to see the benefits of learning how to connect with authentic vulnerability, and how life-changing it can be to open up to new dynamics and healthier patterns in romantic relationships.
Whatever your thoughts on the first rendition of “The Goop Lab,” if any, “Sex Love & Goop” is a whole other show. Unlike the first series (which often was selling products to “optimize” your life) this audience is not being sold anything. The message is clear: self-acceptance and vulnerability will improve your relationship with yourself and your partner(s).
Sex Therapy on TV
With each episode, we’re invited to delve deeper into the couples’ relationships, their strengths and their challenges. Sexological bodyworkers and coaches are there gently nudging them along on their (sometimes uncomfortable) journey. Ultimately, each person meets a truer version of themself and their partner. It starts with learning about their “erotic blueprint” to understand how they are “wired” sexually and what kind of pleasure fits their preference (you can take the quiz here: erotic blueprint quiz). One participant finds out through the quiz that his wife is kinky. He laughs and decides he doesn’t know what to do with that information because he isn’t kinky. Their coach leads them through some sensory play and introduces them to what the broad lexicon of kink can entail…and he quickly learns the lesson, “don’t knock it till you try it”–all in one episode.
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, “Sex, Love, & Goop” might be a fun (and educational) show to watch with a friend or a lover. Each episode is about 30 to 40 minutes and chock-full of information and ideas to improve your sex-life. And you never know, it could be an impetus that pushes you and your partner into deeper trust, the courage to share what turns you both on and more connected sex. Also, if you’re not partnered, this show could be just as valuable and informative. Self-acceptance is a major part of the relational healing explored in the series.
Some of the main takeaways from this show:
- Be honest. Opening up to your partner about what you want, how you feel, and where your struggles lie is the first step toward curating a fulfilling sex-life.
- Curiosity and mental flexibility will lead you into healthy experimentation with your partner.
- We can learn a lot from these professionals. Sex therapists and coaches exist for a reason. One of the sexologists says, “good sex is a skill set, like golf, that can be learned.”
- How you feel about your body matters. Show it love and appreciation for all that it does to serve you. You deserve love and pleasure simply because you exist, not because of how you look.
- Relax and enjoy yourself/your partner rather than pursuing a goal in during sex. Let enjoyment be the goal.
- New paths to pleasure are endless. If you think you’ve tried everything, chances are you haven’t tried something in this way, or in that way.
- Liberate yourself from unhealthy relationship cycles.
In addition the series moves into energy work and family systems. They show how this work compliments sex and relationship therapy. Old family dynamics can often unknowingly shape who we are and how we present and act in relationships. Learning how we act without thinking gives us the chance to adjust our behavior from what we were conditioned to believe and how we would like to connect intimately.
Vulnerability
Vulnerability is brave, and without it, we stagnate. This was a strong message throughout “Sex, Love, & Goop.” The bravery that it takes to be honest with yourself and others is within you! And it’s an important step on your journey to more fulfilling relationships. Remember, you deserve a happy and healthy sex life.
Contact me here if you would like support or are interested in what sex coaching could look like for you.
And have a Happy Valentine’s Day! Here are a couple of sales and discounts for Foria and Quim to celebrate the holiday!